I had a slurpee and a cigarette,
a hot taquito - they were two for .99
I hocked a loogie on the sidewalk,
today I ate and smoked at the same time.
I watched the hot dog roll under the heatlamp - down at the corner store...
just like watchin' the earth on its axis - with ketchup at the core!
I watched the hot dog roll - until they threw me in the trash.
You're gonna roll, just like that, because you'll always need the casssssh!
You know why?
I betcha don't know why!

YOU'RE A DRIVE TEXTIN'
MUFFIN EATIN'
LULU LEMON
CROSS LEGGED ON A WINGBACK CHAIR
DON'T YA TELL ME NAMASTE YA DIRTY SON OF A BITCH! (X2)

I never trust a man, with a little topknow wearin' no socks
I never trust a woman, who never blinks at me when she talks.
You can knit nice infinity scarves for all the trees in your neighborhood -
and you can walk around downtown all day wearin' rubber boots...lookin' so damn good!
But you'll always need my help - to thread the needle through its eye
When I feel ya touch my shoulder I hear a Teradactyl cry!

CHORUS